


Darcy Lewis, Agent Darcy Lewis

by DinahLance



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Darcy Lewis is a badass, Darcy Lewis is ditzy as hell, Darcy Lewis meets The Hulk, SHIELD Agent Darcy Lewis
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-25
Updated: 2016-05-03
Packaged: 2018-05-16 03:42:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,399
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5812444
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DinahLance/pseuds/DinahLance
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Darcy Lewis is recruited into S.H.I.E.L.D by Agent Hill after the events of Thor 2. </p>
<p>Non-canon compliant after Thor: The Dark World. Because fluff and whatnot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In which Darcy is completely bored

**Author's Note:**

> Short first chapter, as a test run. Not sure of update schedule yet. Comments, critique and whatnot always appreciated.

Chapter One

Darcy sighed, fingernails tapping idly on her empty coffee cup. Nothing was happening. Well, there were the usual beeps of equipment, the hushed tones of her colleagues over comms and the ever-present hum of computer fans, but nothing exciting was happening, and wasn't that the point of the last year? Sitting in a stuffy van with nothing to do but watch and wait was not part of the plan. She sighed, louder than she meant to. Agent Carlton glared at her for the third time in twenty minutes, before a squark over the comms drew her back to her screens.

Darcy leant forward eagerly, trying to overhear the message, only to sulkily slouch back into her chair at the Agent's dismissive hand wave. Nothing exciting. Not even something interesting like Hawkeye disappearing in a vent system, or Iron Man stopping by with ice cream. She sighed.

She had to admit, a stakeout in a van wasn't as boring as data entry and she looked upon that as a blessing, but at least with paperwork you go in knowing that there's a 99.5% chance nothing will explode. The boredom is obvious from the get go. Stakeouts are meant to begin boring but have a middle full of unexpected suspects or high speed chases and end with unexpected traps full of highly intelligent robot ferrets or something, not hours and hours sitting in a badly ventilated van. Hours, maybe, but not hours and hours. Darcy had run out of caffeine a good four hours ago and she was beginning to feel cranky. Agent Carlton's disinterest in talking wasn't helping either. Darcy was on observation placement, okay, which meant she had to actually observe something. Ten hours of the side of a screen was not part of the agreement.

She was starting to miss Jane's laboratory. Okay, if Darcy was honest she had started missing Jane and her lab and her notes and her mess pretty much as soon as she'd agreed to Agent Hill's offer of work at S.H.I.E.L.D, even though it was the most amazing thing to happen to her (and she'd tasered a Norse god once). Being an intern was great, what with the no uniform or early morning meetings, but Agent Hill had offered her the chance to put herself to the test by rushing her through the S.H.I.E.L.D recruitment and training program in New York. There was no choice really, so she said goodbye to Jane and Erik and the intern and packed her things, taking an early morning flight and spending the whole journey worrying that Agent Hill had made the biggest mistake in her career and shouldn't she be starting at the bottom with everyone else, anyway? But it turns out Darcy has an awful lot of practical experience with 'extra-terrestrials, advanced technology, and current applied science' (Darcy translation - "all that weird-and-woobly stuff that keeps happening at me") so Agent Hill arranged for her to have extra combat training and an intense course on S.H.I.E.L.D protocol before dumping her in the advanced classes for just about everything.

She liked her classmates, for the most part, and they rubbed along fairly well on a day-to-day basis, she even had a few people she'd happily call friends. Classes were great, she scored pretty well in most of them (number three in hand to hand combat, thank you very much), completed her stint in Records and now it was her first week as a probationary Agent (Agent! Darcy's mind squeals like she's fourteen again, because come on!) and here she was observing Team Epsilon and she was SO. FREAKING. BORED.

Agent Carlton slammed her hand down on the desk, taking a deep breath before turning to Darcy with a saccharine smile plastered across her face.

"Probationary Agent Lewis. Coffee run. If you wouldn't mind."

"Yes, ma'am! I mean, Agent!" Darcy shot to her feet, almost skipping her way to the back door of the van. "Same as last time?"

Agent Carlton nodded sharply, fingers massaging her temples.

"Please. And don't rush, Probationary Agent. It would appear that nothing will happen before the end of our shift, if at all. So just, take your time."

"Sure thing, boss!" Darcy pushed open the door and jumped into the warm afternoon sunlight, squinting until she pulled down her oversized sunglasses to shade her eyes. "Back before you know it!"

The van door clanged as Darcy enthusiastically departed.

Agent Carlton took a beat before exhaling long and slow, through her nose.

"I swear you and Jessie were never this bad, Oliver," she said to the man to her right who was unsuccessfully trying not to laugh, and then glared at the snort from the person behind her. "You weren't!"

"Didn't Oliver once drive the SUV into a nest of mutated hornets that were so big they poked holes through the sides of the van with their stingers? You made him spend the weekend patching the holes and it was raining the whole time."

Oliver waved his hands in the air, sticking his tongue out at Jessie, who smirked back. "Yeah yeah, don't forget the time you poked that slime bubble and it exploded over everything," he pointed out. "And the frozen mailman incident. And..."

"Okay! Alright, I get the point," said Carlton, conceding wearily. "I just don't remember either of you being quite so... excitable."

"Give her time, Luce." offered Jessie, as they turned back to their screens. "And less caffeine."

Carlton thumped her head on the desk. "Shit."

 

\----------


	2. In which we meet some henchmen

Balancing four drinks, a bag of muffins, another bag of scones (gluten-free, for Oliver) and jamming a cookie in her mouth whilst opening the coffee shop door takes all of Darcy's freshly trained reflexes and focus, which is why she's not that embarrassed when an unexpected explosion from three blocks over knocks her on her ass as all the windows on the street burst.

_Ooft. Hope nobody saw that._

Darcy can't help but lie there for a moment until her mind and body catch up to the rest of the world.

_I'm a real Agent now, emergency situation and all_ is the slightly confused thought that runs around her head screaming as she dumps the coffee and cake to one side, picks herself up, and takes off running towards the van and the rest of her team.

She doesn't even make it to the next corner before something large and metal and heavy slams into her from the side, smashing her head up against a shop door. She wheezes, all the breath knocked from her by her attacker, but it doesn't matter, her body reacts before her brain can and she grabs some loose wires dangling before her and pulls.

There's a funny little electric _pop_ , the smell of burning plastic, and her attacker screams. The next thing she knows, the large metallic body that had been crushing her had pulled away, falling back into the road. Her eyes were blurry from the impact - _uh oh, dizziness and blurry vision, I've probably got a concussion, my poor poor head!_ \- but she could swear that she'd just been jumped by an 8-ft metal T-Rex with a person sitting in the chest cavity.

No really, there was a large metallic dinosaur flailing its way down the street, desperately trying to put out the electrical fire Darcy had managed to inadvertently start on its head.

"What in the Asgard? Who even makes a mech-Rex and keeps the arms the original proportions?" Darcy is flummoxed. Like, up until now she had no idea how one could even feel flummoxed, or what it meant, but it felt like the appropriate reaction to this weird situation- watching a giant robot dinosaur flail ineffectively at its spreading fire-y haircut as it frantically wove its way past abandoned cars to get away from her. It must have been in a fight before it attacked Darcy, she idly noticed, as there were panels that looked like they'd been ripped off its side and chest, wires protruding from neck and shoulders, and it had a hole where presumably its tail had been. She tried not to snort as it fell over a Mini Cooper, failed, and then grabbed her head and moaned as another wave of dizziness washed over her.

_First day on the job, first emergency and I get myself injured. Come on, Darcy! Get to it, girl!_

One deep breath later and she was determinedly pulling herself to her feet, using the doorframe to steady herself. She tapped her earbud, but all that she could hear was low static. It must have been broken when the T-Rex had jumped her.

"Okay. State of emergency, explosions, mecha dinosaurs. No idea where my team is, no way to contact them. Um. Guess the best thing is to head to the nearest S.H.I.E.L.D facility and find someone who can tell me what to do...hmm." Her head was pounding. The nearest S.H.I.E.L.D building was... huh. A garage holding some of their heavier trucks and things. It was only a few blocks away, and there had to be someone there who could give her orders on how to help.

Decision made, Darcy spun around and started back the way she came, carefully avoiding the smoking, twitching robo-Rex that was sprawled in the middle of the road. Thankfully it seemed that all the local civilian populace had evacuated or hidden - she was the only person out on the street. Two blocks down, one to go. Shouldn't be too hard to make it to the garage if I can keep out of sight, she thought breathlessly, trying to ignore all the little cuts and bruises on her skin that were just now starting to hurt. Of course, that was when she saw what could only be described as a dinosaur stampede coming towards her down the street.

She couldn't help but freeze as she saw a stegosaurus bodyslam a truck out of the way, only for a brachiosaurus to step on it and flatten it a moment later. There was no way she could take on that many, and some of them were huge.

Time to hide.

Darcy threw herself underneath a 4x4 that was parked nearby. She pulled herself into a tight ball, and hoped like blazes that she wouldn't get stepped on. The crashes and bangs and scream of metal surrounded her, she could see giant feet slamming the ground just metres away, and it was all she could do to lie there and wait.

The dinosaur parade seemed to last for hours, even though it couldn't have been more that a few minutes at most. She could hear the blood pounding in her ears, feel the whimper in her chest that was desperate to get out.

_I know I signed up for this,_ she reminded herself, _but dinosaurs? Badly made robotic dinosaurs? Didn't expect that one..._

There was a (relatively) small, spiky dino using a nearby convertible as a bouncy castle, the suspension creaking as it flung itself onto the next car onwards.

And just like that, the dinosaurs were gone. The sounds of destruction continued, but were fading into the distance, away from her hiding spot.

Darcy breathed out, hoping that that was the last of them. She kept herself still in the dust and dirt of the road, squeezing her eyes and desperately trying not to even think about sneezing. Or itchy noses. Or tickly throats. Or...

*Aaaachooo!*

Oh damn.

The next thing she knew she was dangling upside down from one ankle, 7 feet up in the air.

"Got another one, chief," a harsh mechanical voice came out of a speaker somewhere above her, and the metal grip around her calf tightened as she was shaken like she was being shown off as a trophy. Another hand was ripping off her belt and sidearm, and she felt her earbud fall out, heard the sound of it crunch under the armoured thug's foot. "Some bimbo with an earpiece and a gun. Want me to add her to the collection?"

"Hey, asshole!" Darcy shouted, bending at the waist to grab at her ankle holster (thank you, Agent Hill and your compulsory calisthenics classes) where she kept her spare weapon. She twisted as far as she could with the thug still holding onto her, and aimed the taser at the surprised face poking out of the top of the dino suit encasing him. She fired as he jerked her sideways, and she hit the frame near the top of his chest instead. The taser went off, and whoever had designed the dinosaur suit must be a colossal idiot because they'd made it of a conductive materiel. Plus side, crispy henchman. Negative side, Darcy found herself flying through the air and landing with a crunch on the windscreen of a nearby car, her arm twisted at a horrible angle underneath her.

_Seriously, do they not know about the god of thunder flying about New York these days? I can see the thunderclouds from here! Also, ow. Ow, ow, ow. That one hurt._

It feels like a dislocation rather than a break (Darcy has four older brothers, and enough familial accidents involving swings and slides had occurred in her childhood that she could tell the difference between a break and a dislocation), so there isn't a great deal she can do about it right now.

_Thunderclouds? That means Avengers! I hope there's someone nearby because I can't take on a robo-dino by myself, especially not an..._ she squinted at the dinosaur that was stalking towards her. It was squat and heavy looking, with thick armoured plates bolted to most of its body.

"An Ankylosaur? Seriously? Did you arrive late to the 'Pick Your Dinosaur No Repeats meeting?"

The man inside the suit yelled incoherently at her and flailed the mech's arms.

"Good comeback, bro," she yelled back, as she scooted backwards off the car hood, placing the vehicle between them. "That'll teach you to be on time to office events!"

He screamed again, the speakers distorting the sound into loud electronic squeals, and threw the mech towards her. Its heavy, lopsided gait was surprisingly quick. She ran, dodging among the cars as best she could

_Now what, Darce? You're injured, alone, and the bad guys are definitely larger than you. You could use some back up right about....now._

She stopped dead in her tracks, and the robo-dino-man must have thought she'd given up as he roared in triumph and closed in on her.

"Hey, Ankylo-loser?" she threw over the back of her shoulder. "I think I have a new friend to introduce you to!" She dropped to the ground, grinning her head off as an answering roar from in front of her reverberated down the street.

"HULK SMASH PUNY DINO!"

All Darcy could see from her vantage point on the ground was a large pair of very purple pants attached to very green skin, as the Hulk hurdled over her and slammed head first into the body of the Ankylosaur.


	3. In which Darcy meets the Avengers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay in posting this. Hoping to get the chapters posted weekly from now on, crossed fingers!

If there was one thing that Darcy found truly unbelievable (you know, apart from alien invasions, alternate dimensions, and the abysmal quality of the muffins at S.H.I.E.L.D. morning meetings) it was that she was friends with the Avengers. Well, friends was maybe a stretch. Thor's a sweetie, obviously, and Cap always smiles at her when they pass in the corridor and asks her how her studies were going, maybe offers her a suggestion on an essay topic or recommends a new coffee place opened up nearby (he's told her to call him Steve about twenty times but she just can't, and it tickles him no end). Tony's great, once you get past the terrible flirting and his constant need to remind you how intelligent he is. They've got this kind of hate-flirt jibe going where he talks about her boobs and she retorts with new and interesting ways for him to be castrated. It might be weird, but it works.

Natasha is definitely a friend though, and if you are friends with Natasha then you are friends with Clint and Pepper.

 

The first time it happened was only a few days after Darcy had arrived at S.H.I.E.L.D.; she was still feeling very much the new guy, and the few friends she'd made were on a different lunch schedule. There was always Jane's lab but to be honest whatever she was working on these days smelt _really_ bad, and she only had a half hour to eat before she had her next class. She'd found a small table tucked away to one side, partially hidden by a plant pot, and cracked open her notes on 'The History and Practical Use of Codes, Ciphers and The Enigma Machine'. She was halfway through bullet-pointing an essay chapter, highlighter lid dangling from her mouth, humming a little tunelessly, when Black Widow slid into the single seat opposite her.

"Communications essay?"

Darcy was too busy trying not to stare at the woman sat across from her to realise that that's exactly what she was most definitely doing.

"Buh...what?"

Black Widow raised one perfectly sculpted eyebrow and waited, arms crossed and gaze measuring, for Darcy's brain to finish rebooting.

"Essay. Yes. I'm writing an essay. On communications. For my class. It's pretty interesting, actually, like I had no idea that cracking Enigma was a joint Polish/British/French deal and that they remodeled a stately British manor to hide their offices and for some reason they built a fake cricket clubhouse with a freaking clock tower as part of their cover. None of that was in the terrible film I found on Netflix. Not the one with Cucumbersquash, the other one, where the Americans saved the day, which didn't happen, I mean a quick Google tells you how wrong that notion is."

Maybe she wasn't quite there yet. Man, her mouth was gonna be the end of her one of these days. Darcy held her breath, no idea if she'd said anything that might make Black Widow pull out one of her guns and start shooting (Darcy hated to make snap judgements about people but so far the Widow hadn't cracked a single facial expression, and Darcy had counted 6 guns on her body _at least_ which was, quite frankly, terrifying). Oh Asgard, she couldn't remember a word she'd just said. She closed her eyes and prayed for a quick and painless death.

There was a funny sort of sniggering sound coming from straight in front of her. Darcy cracked an eye open, only to see Black Widow was desperately trying to hold in a giggle fit, hand clamped across her mouth and her eyes dancing. It was hard to do anything but grin back, really.

"Jane said you were funny," Black Widow wheezed out eventually, after laughing so hard Darcy was able to calm down and then freak out and then calm down again. Oscillating feelings, you're the best. Whatever.

"Thanks? I guess?" She offered Black Widow a kind of half-smile self-deprecatory kinda grin, still unsure as to what was actually going on. It isn't every day a superhero interrupts your lunchbreak on your first week at work.

Black Widow shrugged, a smile still playing across her face. "This place can always use a laugh. You should come to movie night tomorrow. I'm guessing you're the sort of person who yells at the tv when people are being stupid. Steve'll love someone to join in with him when he starts in on historical inaccuracies."

Darcy blinked, a little shocked by the sudden subject change. _Did Black Widow just invite me over to hang with the Avengers? You're kidding me, right?_

"Yeah totally, movie night with my family can get downright rowdy. My youngest brother threw a Wii remote at Matthew McConaughey's face once, went right through the screen. Mom was pissed and he got grounded for the next semester."

Black Widow looked thoughtful, and asked "So you're from a big family?"

"Yep, Mom, Dad, me and my four brothers."

"Perfect." The smile that Black Widow was now sporting was, for want of a better word, predatory. "Movie night's tomorrow at 8, Stark Tower. JARVIS will let you in. Jane's said she'll come but you know what she's like, she'll need herding out of her lab."

_Black Widow knows Jane well enough to invite her to a movie night at the Avengers HQ and I've just been invited too._ Darcy pinched her leg surreptitiously and yep, she was definitely awake. "Cool, I'll bring brownies and Jane."

Black Widow stood, gave Darcy a once look over from head to toe, and extended her hand. Darcy scrambled to her feet before shaking it, hoping her palms weren't too damp and clammy.

"It was nice to meet you, Darcy."

"Ah, you too, Black Widow."

She cocked one last eyebrow, and said, "Natasha" as she leaves. Darcy can't find anything to say to that.

 

And that's how Darcy ended up at the weekly Avengers movie night. Surreal isn't a strong enough word. (Steve thinks her brownies are the best though, which more than made up for any awkwardness she felt that first night, sat with a super soldier and two spies and a genius multi-billionaire and a god all watching crappy B-movies, with Steve so adorably confused by the concept of 'so bad it's brilliant', Clint trying to explain 'straight-to-TV' to Thor and Tony chipping in with 'helpful'movie trivia. Natasha just topped up Pepper's cosmopolitan and laughed.)

Since then, Natasha's been joining Darcy for lunch at least once a week, always quizzing her on whatever lectures she's had that day before saying 'hi', and with her comes Pepper and Clint. It's an odd friendship, but it works. They bond over living with many large, loud men - Darcy's brothers and the male Avengers being too similar for Darcy's comfort - and Pepper's dry comments and Clint's dirty mind keep Darcy laughing through those first few grueling months of training.

 

There's just one exception to the 'All Avengers Love Darcy' rule, and for the life of her Darcy cannot figure out why.

It's the night after her lunch with Natasha and she's got a yawning Jane tucked under one arm and a tray of brownies balanced on her other hand, standing in the middle of the downstairs foyer of Stark Tower and looking lost when a disembodied British voice asks her her name and business.

"Ah, Darcy and Jane, here for movie night? Bla- uh, Natasha invited me?"

She grimaced - finding her 'Agent voice' was going to be something she had to work on. Agent Coulson had managed to confiscate her iPod from her with barely more than a sentence or two, and that was seriously impressive. She swears, the man could sway governments and barely have to raise his voice or break a sweat. He could talk down Fury, for goodness sake.

"Ah yes, good evening Ms Lewis and Ms Foster. The elevator is waiting for you. The team is currently on floor 80 in the room designated 'the den', and tonight's selection of films falls into the 'pop culture B-movies', I believe."

"Thank you, ah, JARVIS?"

"Correct. Please ask if you need anything, Ms Lewis. The elevator is here."

The door directly in front of them slid open with a soft ping, and Darcy walked a half-asleep Jane into the plushly-decorated space.

"Hey Jane, wake up." Jane moaned into the side of Darcy's neck, cuddling closer to her friend and trying to hide her face from the light. "Jane, you can sleep through the movies, but I can't carry you and the brownies at the same time."

"The room's moving," came the muffled reply. Darcy shifted, trying to balance the brownies better whilst simultaneously hiking Jane up out of her cleavage. 

"Yes Jane, the room is moving," she sighed, smiling down at her friend. Jane got really touchy-feely when she was tired and it was, admittedly, adorable. Trying to keep her upright could be a hassle though. "Come on, we're almost there-"

The elevator stopped and the doors opened, and whatever Darcy was about to say was lost when she looked up and saw the man standing in what should have been the empty hallway of Floor 80, with such a look of surprise on his face that she meeped and almost dropped the tray of brownies on Jane's head.

"Oh, crap on a cracker!" she exclaimed as she righted the tray, only to lose hold on Jane whose head slipped down and ended up right between her breasts. She swore again, trying to get her arm back under Jane's and almost losing the brownies again in the process. She was saved by the stranger taking the tray out of her hands, leaving her free to grab Jane with both arms. She ended up with Jane slung over her back, arms wrapped around Darcy's neck.

"Thanks," she said breathlessly, holding out a hand for the tray.

"That's alright," he answered, quietly, and then inexplicably blushed before handing the brownies to her. "Are you going up?"

"Am I-" Darcy checked the lit button by the door. It was labelled 'Floor 57'. "Oh, yes. Sorry, thought this was 80."

The man cocked an eyebrow at her and asked in a slightly shocked tone "80? Really?"

She couldn't help it, she glared at him. "Is that so surprising?"

He looked her up and down, and she had the sudden realisation that she must look extremely odd, home baking in one hand and Jane wrapped round her, v-neck top pulled down on one side where Jane had face-planted her tits. Not the usual sort of visitor to the Avengers personal section of the Tower. Then again, who was this guy? She gave him the once over in return, fair's fair after all.

He was not that much taller than her, with messy greying hair and glasses, dressed simply in a button down blue shirt and grey slacks. He was definitely older though, and it looked like he worked out if the shifting muscles under his sleeves were anything to go by. He had pretty eyes, she noted absently, and the tips of his ears were still pink from his earlier blush, and then her new training kicked in.

"Leaking pen in your shirt pocket, no ID badge and it looks like you haven't slept in a few days. Either you're a surprising pick for an undercover spy or you're Dr Banner."

The man froze, staring at Darcy as if she was suddenly contagious or something. "Who are you?" he demanded, quietly but firmly. She grinned at him, trying to defuse a situation she didn't entirely understand but was very sure that she didn't want to escalate. She knew about The Hulk of course, that was covered in basic, but she'd heard stories from Jane too and she was pretty certain she'd be okay in a room with Dr Banner. Admittedly, a slightly larger room than the elevator would be preferable.

"Darcy Lewis. Ah, S.H.I.E.L.D Agent-In-Training Lewis. Bl-Natasha invited me. For films. I brought brownies! Um. I'd shake your hand but ah, full, y'know?" She laughed, nervously.

He blinked. After a moment of silence, he asked "Is that Jane?"

"Yeah? We're friends. Well, we were colleagues first. Okay, I was her intern. Unpaid. But we're friends now."

He took in her babble, and considered it.

"Is she drunk?"

"No? Just tired. She's a cuddler when she's tired. Like a tiny bear. That cuddles. Which is fine because I like cuddles. Cuddles are great." Another nervous giggle escaped before she could tamp it down. _Honestly, Darce, he may be cute but he's an Avenger, this is not the time to be flirting. Badly._

Dr Banner nods at this, as if he too has had to deal with Jane's lack of personal space issues. Which he might have, since Jane moved in with Thor last year. When she looks over at him again he's studiously ignoring them both. Now she's the one blushing, goodness knows why, and presses the button to get elevator moving again. The rest of the trip was short but silent, with Darcy watching Dr Banner out of the corner of her eye until the doors opened, and Dr Banner staring at the floor as if he's pretending she doesn't exist.

"Soooo, which way to the den?" she asked, turning, but Dr Banner had already strode out into the hallway and was disappearing through a closing door. She stopped in the elevator entrance, confused and lost. _If Dr Banner's an Avenger, isn't he invited to movie night? Rude, he could have told me where to go first._

"Ms Lewis?" JARVIS' voice interrupts her thoughts. "The den is situated at the end of the hallway, through the kitchen area and to the left."

"Thanks, JARV, I appreciate it." Darcy hiked Jane further onto her back and starts down the hallway, definitely not staring wistfully at the door Banner had gone through as she passes. _It's not that I'm interested, even if he does have that whole 'hot, brainy older guy' thing going on, and I've spent so much time around scientists I can't help but find science sexy. Nope, not interested. I just want to find out more about the so-called 'Silent Avenger'. He never gives any interviews, there's barely any photos of him not Hulk-ed out and green. He's, okay, well he's interesting._

"JARVIS is fine, Ms Lewis." It has to be the most genteel reprimand Darcy has ever received. She grins, nods in acceptance and crosses the kitchen into a room designed to be comfy. After the steel-glass-and-marble theme of the rest of the building, this room feels like the inside of a cosy slipper.

"Sure thing, JARVIS, but only if I get to be Darcy."

"DARCY! AND MY BELOVED JANE!"

"Hi Thor" Darcy replies with a grin, and happily hands off the now completely unconscious Jane into the arms of her exuberant boyfriend. Thor sweeps Jane up effortlessly and lies her down on a nearby sofa with tender care, placing her head in his lap and stroking her hair. Darcy can't help but sigh at the picture the two of them make, cosy and content. _Ugh, I can't even be jealous of them,_ she grumbles internally, but there's no malice there. When you get front row seats at the ongoing saga of your best friend and her alien-god boyfriend and get to see the drama and stress and chaos up close, you lose your romantic sensibilities quickly. Don't get Darcy wrong, it's been far too long since she's been in a relationship and she is a teensy bit jealous of the romantic gestures and kisses and sex and whatnot that Jane and Thor are wrapped up in, but she's more than happy not to have to deal with the accompanying family issues (though it would be hard to find someone to top the overwhelming _crazy_ that's Loki) and the whole 'my boyfriend is an immortal alien' crap. Darcy would be happy for coffee dates and maybe movie watching and holding hands.

Like that's going to happen anytime soon.

Luckily that's when Natasha appeared, dragging Captain America ( _Steve!_ ) behind her, ignoring his complaints about the movie selection for the evening - "Come on Nat, why are you making watch such terrible movies? I have so much to catch up on, shouldn't we be watching _good_ movies and not wasting time?" "Shut up Rogers, Sharknado is a goddamn _masterpiece_ ," and Clint dropping from an air vent, stealing three brownie pieces and stuffing them in his mouth before she had realised he was there. Pepper and Tony are already in the room, him sulking because she wouldn't let him tinker with whatever gadget he had brought with him and she rolling her eyes ignoring him and waving Darcy over to join her on the sofa.

Darcy relaxed into the chaos that was apparently an Avengers movie night, and if she couldn't help thinking about Dr Banner and his blush and subsequent escape to who knows where rather than hanging out with his friends, well who can blame her.


End file.
